What To Do On Your Days Off (That Isn't Scrolling Instagram)
It was one particular Saturday when the sun was out and the day was gorgeously temperate—the kind of air you could swim freely in without feeling unbearably cold or overly heated. You can sense that the energy around was so awake and alive again after a string of gloomy, rainy days. Everyone was feeling uplifted and joyous, at least that’s how it looked living so close to the bustling downtown area of Jersey City where the main street is lined with restaurants and bars all eager about their outdoor dining again. I felt like I could do anything with such an open day, with no particular schedule to dictate my time; an entirely free Saturday to myself (which I can say with complete confidence is a rarity). And I had FOMO for the sunshine and outside world again because I’m the type of person who feeds off the surrounding energy to feel the same sense of liveliness.
The problem was, my mind was racing with a million things I could do with all this free time now. Should I get some errands that have been racking up throughout the week? But what if I spent the day in the park to read? Or I could reach out to some nearby friends to hit up an outdoor bar since those days will be dwindling when winter comes? Maybe I should get to planning for that project/event I have coming up. There was just so much I could do but I didn’t know which I wanted to do first, or at all. So I was paralyzed by the overwhelming list and my thriving energy was soon shot down by my lack of drive. It wasn’t long before the fear of cabin fever and isolation quickly overcame my body and I was getting overly anxious to do anything so that I wouldn’t feel like I was wasting a perfectly good day off.
After a couple days of reflection about that particular moment that day—paralyzed by an exhaustive to-do list then experiencing extreme anxiety over not deciding what to do—I realized that it wasn’t a matter of having too much to do (because that will never not be the case as an aspiring entrepreneur), but it was a matter of what I truly needed in that moment based off what I was feeling. It’s not that I don’t have the drive, it’s that the drive would come once I figured out what kind of energy I could use that day.
A lot of us think we have to do everything to feel like we’re doing something. We spread ourselves thin or throw any part of ourselves against a wall, hoping something valuable enough will stick and give us the direction we need. But most of the time, it’s not that we don’t already have what we need to push us forward, it’s actually that we aren’t considering what we can give based off our present energy, not foreseeable energy. The thing is, our minds run too far and too rampant for our own bodies to keep up with, which leaves our bodies feeling overwhelmed and ultimately, paralyzed. That’s why I believe that starting with how you’re feeling at a given moment will be the starting point you’re looking for to get ahead.
So I decided to create a list, or “menu”, based off what exactly I need and am feeling in that moment, to refer to any time I have another day off and don’t want to find myself spending hours feeling FOMO off other people’s Instagram Stories. By doing this, I am listening to my body, I am staying in tune with my emotions, and I am feeding my own energy with what I have at that moment. Whether I get to one or two of these things doesn’t matter because I know that my energy will feel nourished no matter what just by doing what I needed for myself. Just as we can’t be everything to everyone, we also can’t do everything for every part of ourself. Sometimes, we simply need to address one part of ourselves at a time.
So take a look, read through, and hopefully this “menu” will also be helpful for you the next time you feel stuck with what to do. Or make your own, too!
If you’re feeling creative…
It’s not everyday your creative juices are flowing so it’s a great opportunity to stretch beyond what you’re used to. Nourish that energy by exploring outside your comfort zone or diving deeper into your current creative hobbies and passions. These are moments when your mind is willing to be stretched out and expanded further so feed that craving by doing the weird, abstract, and artistic.
I have Pinterest board for painting ideas/inspiration.
Paint
This amazing business sends painting kits! (use code: MAI20 for a discount)
Freestyle/freeform dancing
You can also learn some dances from this Youtube channel by my friend Bo Belza!
Try a new (and difficult?) recipe
I’ve personally been exploring more cultural dishes to stay close to my Vietnamese heritage
Do some creative writing (stream of consciousness, poetry, storytelling, satire piece)
I have some great writing prompts to start here
Bullet journal
Impromptu photoshoot
Take a walk around the neighborhood and snap some artsy photos
DIY some home & beauty products
Here’s a DIY booklet that Amanda Smith and I created for a DIY Eco-Conscious Beauty Products workshop we hosted last year
Learn a new hobby (jewelry-making? calligraphy? master a handstand?)
Decorate some vases or pots
If you’re feeling lazy…
Sometimes you just need a break —- both mentally and physically —- and that’s ok, too. Our bodies need a moment to recover and recuperate without exhausting extra energy, whether it’s due to work or socialization or general stress. We’re allowed to take a pause even when we’re doing “nothing” but that doesn’t mean we’re not doing anything because we’re humans and there’s only so much we can give ourselves away before burning out.
Binge watch a TV show
Read a book
Perhaps read one by an AAPI author or Black author?
Do some light stretching
Catch up on sleep (you need the rest so it is ok!)
Listen to non-news podcasts
My favorites are On Being, The Moth, or Dis/sect
Meditate
Watch some easy Youtube videos (like hair tutorials or cooking shows or vlogs?)
Take an extra long shower or bath (add some aromatherapy or bath salts, do a hair mask)
Sit outside on your balcony or stoop, and absorb the energy around you (sights, sounds, etc. help stimulate and awaken the senses!)
You may even feel inspired to document these as part of a potential poem or writing piece
If you’re feeling antsy…
Your blood is pumping but your anxiety is running on high. These are the times you need to get your body moving but you don’t want to overwork your already anxious mind so the best way to use up that extra energy is to partake in mindless activities that still keep you physically active. They’re simple tasks (most likely from your long list of errands to do) that don’t require extra thinking.
My proud moment of decanting all my pantry goods with upcycled jars.
Do a quick exercise
My friend Eiryn has a bunch of amazing workout routines on her IG here
Walk (or run) around the block or to the park
Bike ride around, maybe even take the scenic route
Clean your room or kitchen or bathroom
Finally get rid of random things
Sell on Poshmark/Depop or FB Marketplace
Give away for free on Buy Nothing
Donate to local shelters/organizations (not Goodwill or Salvation Army!)
A friend of mine is one of the founders of Well Cloth’d who provides clothing and goods to underserved communities in Brooklyn
Decant pantry goods and label with that fancy label-maker you bought a while ago
Garden or repot your plants
If you’re feeling productive…
For those rare moments when your mind has the extra capacity to feel challenged or get to brainstorming, you can attend to those “finally’s.” And I say “finally’s” because we all have that running list of things we’ve always wanted to do or have been meaning to get to but there is simply never enough time in the day. This is different from the creative list or antsy list because we’re investing our full mental energy with what we know we’re already capable of doing.
Outline a game plan for your Big Idea (we all have at least one or a few!)
Bonus: Hit up that one friend or IG connect whom you’ve been meaning to collaborate with. Whether it’s a photographer, fellow creative, or an entrepreneur you look up to, it doesn’t hurt to ask!
Catchup on some educational or insightful reads/articles
Here’s a tip: I save stories or articles I want to get to when I have time into my drafts section of my email
I have some great articles shared here
Engage in some social justice & community initiatives
I have a list to help you get started here
Look up some Skillshare workshops or watch some TedTalk videos to learn something new and beneficial
Plan out your meals for the week - this also helps you save money and eat healthier!
Plan out your Instagram feed and captions (if you’re a social media person like me haha)
If you’re feeling lonely…
When you’re feeling particularly isolated or have spent too much alone time (especially for the natural extroverts like myself), you need some sort of outside company or social interaction. While we’re not always able to jump into a car and drive to a friend’s place (or they’re not available at the moment), there are other ways you can fulfill that need to be around others because we’re humans who are naturally inclined to feel energized by other’s energies, too. The point here is to feel like we’re around others, whether in person or visually.
I wrote a letter to future self a while ago and reread it recently, and it was exactly everything I needed to hear at the time.
FT or phone a friend
Sit and people watch at a coffeeshop or park
Write letters to friends & family - even if it’s not within the moment, the act of letter writing still satisfies that need to be close to people while also practicing personal gratitudes. It will help deepen the relationship as well!
Write a letter to your future self
Tune into a virtual workshop or IG live
Spontaneously visit a nearby friend
Look up what is happening in your neighborhood that day (outdoor market? music in the park?)
Explore new shops in your area
Solo trip to the museum
Buy yourself flowers or coffee or any little treat
Journal - while it may seem like a very isolated activity, you are actually not alone; you are conversing with inner self and your thoughts.
And bonus for the financially-conservative (as I’m trying to be more aware of my spending habits), these activities are all on the low-budget or free.99 side because I personally believe self-care does not have to require spending loads of money to achieve personal joy. While I won’t get into it any further, it’s important to note that we’ve been bred into a society that perpetuates the idea of “retail therapy” or wellness costs that unfortunately, excludes those who aren’t as financially flexible with enough disposable income. With that said, I hope this opens up your perspective on how to take care of yourself and your body when you need it. You are allowed self-care in any way and mode that works best for you!
Enjoy and I hope you get a day off soon :)
